WHAT IS EMOTIONALLY DETACHED

Put simply it is a state of mind where we witness life rather than reacting to life. Now that’s not hard to understand or is it? Let’s explore how to emotionally detach from life’s events shall we?

WHAT IS EMOTIONAL ATTACHMENT/AUTOMATIC REACTION

Let’s first be clear on what emotional attachment is, in order to undo it. Wouldn’t it be great to have one of those UNDO buttons. Press the button “poof” gone!

We can be emotionally attached to our pets, special plants, friends, kids, money, lovers, family, precious memories, homes,WHAT IS EMOTIONALLY DETACHED cars, all of our possessions, all of our favourite things, winning and even our thoughts like possessing our goals, she’s so perfect, he is a hunk and the list goes on.

In fact these attachments are very like addictions. We desire them so much we imagine we can’t live without them and should we lose any of them we feel differing levels of sadness. Notice here we are reacting to loss. An extreme example is loosing our home and everything in it to fire, flood or some natural disaster.

To easily discover our attachments, ask ourselves if we lost “it” and experienced any level of sadness, we were surely attached to it.

Unfortunately, the consequence of being addicted/attached to anything is we give the attachment power over us and they basically control our lives. Another consequence is often what we are so attached to will leave or allude us. Sad but true!

WHAT IS EMOTIONALLY DETACHED/BEING A WITNESS

Our state of mind when we become a witness to life’s events, is keeping a calm nonreactive demeanor, a cool head and we can do whatever we need to do without our emotions becoming involved. Continue reading “WHAT IS EMOTIONALLY DETACHED”

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EMOTIONAL FREEDOM TECHNIQUE HANDOUT-BAGGAGE, BE GONE

Goal No: 8 Let’s explore how to overcome emotional baggage. We all carry emotional baggage and there are ways to release it. We need to learn how to make wise decisions with our emotions in check. Emotionally charged decisions will have us quit, will put us deeper in debt and drop us in the shite.

THE EMOTIONAL BEAST

Firstly we have to recognise the beast is in action. Some examples of these feelings are: believing we are always right andEMOTIONAL FREEDOM TECHNIQUE HANDOUT battering others with our incessant ravings, I have to have it and I have to have it now resulting in blowing the budget, getting into conflict through jealousy, when trying to achieve a task and running into obstacle after obstacle, our emotions overcome us and we miss something important.

The emotional beast is at work when we feel frustrated, fed up, angry, jealous, overwhelmed, overloaded, wound up like a spring, tight as a drum, tense, throw things, hit out, yell, blame, abuse and you know where I’m going with this. These are all damaging emotional patterns.

RESTORE CALMNESS

Have the presence of mind not to take the bait. Simply make a statement like I’m not arguing with you, perhaps we can talk about this later when we are both calmer, I need time to think about this or simply walk away. Try to defuse the situation. A task that is frustrating us where we keep trying the same thing over and over? Simply walk away, take a break, go for a walk and clear our heads. Often when we resume we notice, what we were missing, or see the answer with fresh eyes.

Reactions and decisions guided by highly charged negative emotions never end well.

BECOME A SOCRATES AND WE CAN GO CLOSE

In his day Socrates, a Liberated Adult and well known philosopher once said:

“The secret of change is to focus all of your energy, not on fighting the old, but on building the new”. Continue reading “EMOTIONAL FREEDOM TECHNIQUE HANDOUT-BAGGAGE, BE GONE”

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GOAL NO: 6 EXAMPLES OF OVERCOMING OBSTACLES

Our belly is fired up due to our passions/talents, and along comes the obstacles. This is, unfortunately, perfectly normal and our plan goes “poof” out the window.  .

For the newcomers to my site, a big WELCOME and let me fill you in a bit. HelloTo Happier days is my personal diary of events, over the past 6 or so months, that has led me to the now. Choose to follow my journey, each step of the way, and you will find out where you are in your journey and what comes next.

GUTS, GRUNT, DETERMINATION AND FOCUS

Keep our fires stoked by facing these challenges “head on”. For example, an opportunity came my way that was in conflict with my passion. I was selected for an intensive training program (real hand holding and person to person), that could EXAMPLES OVERCOMING OBSTACLESmaybe bring dollars into my life more rapidly. I was emotionally tempted with the shiny thing, however it meant changing my focus away from my passion, leaving 4 months of work behind and starting again! Bitter pill I was not about to swallow. I faced the dilemma and it took me about a week to discover a way I could have my cake and eat it too!

Instead of changing direction, moving away from my passion, I found a way to weave the program criteria into my passion. Much to my delight, this move has been accepted and I’M IN! Woo Hoo!

I guess what I learned from this, is obstacles can be overcome if we look at them wisely and not allow our emotions to make the decision. I practiced what I preach by staying on track following my passion, thought outside the box and VOILA!

OTHER COMMON OBSTACLES

Continue reading “GOAL NO: 6 EXAMPLES OF OVERCOMING OBSTACLES”

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TOP 10 PERSONAL DEVELOPMENT GOALS NOW WE ARE FIRED UP

WORK OUR BUTTS OFF

Goal No: 5 Action Our Talent. Fired up and ready to nail it? In previous articles we’ve found our passion which led to discovering our talent. Now it’s time to tickle our soul and act on our preordained talent.

Fire gives us the energy to dedicate our efforts to our passions. With determination, consistent and persistent hard work we can bring it home!

PASSION, FIRE AND ENTHUSIASM

Working with our talents is not remotely like the daily grind it used to be when working for a boss. When working for a boss we are not passionately motivated or deeply interested in the company’s future. Sure we give our best but our hearts arePASSION, FIRE AND TALENT not truly in it.

Our passionate talents inspire automatic enthusiasm and motivation. We can’t wait to get into again. Our efforts have grunt and we are turbo charged.

We are alive and up to any challenge that comes our way. With persistent exploration we overcome any challenge and nail it!

POISON

Ingvar Kamprad, billionaire extraordinaire and founder of IKEA quoted “The most dangerous poison is the feeling of achievement. The antidote is to every evening think what can be done better tomorrow”.

I found this surprising. When we achieve we celebrate, reward ourselves and feel good. I believe what Ingvar is saying is we get distracted from the main game celebrating a small but significant goal along the way. I know I indulge myself for too long, wasting precious time with jubilation.

Focusing on “what can be done better tomorrow” moves us closer to our end game. It is said that Ingvar continually had his butt up and head down consistently pursuing ways to help his customers more and the flatpack was born.

The lesson here is if we keep focused on what we are doing, do more of it every single day, find what can be done better to help people, we will be so busy and by the time we look up “poof” the money has followed us. Continue reading “TOP 10 PERSONAL DEVELOPMENT GOALS NOW WE ARE FIRED UP”

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TOP 10 PERSONAL DEVELOPMENT GOALS FIRE YOUR BELLY MEANING

Goal No: 4 FIRE YOUR BELLY MEANINGLet’s look at what is, and how to fire your belly. Follow your passion, discover your talent and light your fire! It is that simple. We all have a hidden talent and the way to discover it is by embracing our passion.

Let’s recap on Goals 1-3: What we have explored and discovered so far.

It’s okay to challenge social norms and become an independent free thinker, how our comfort zones deceive and limit us from exploring, trying new things and how our cosy couches keep us from action.

DISCOVER YOUR PASSION WHICH LIGHTS YOUR FIRE!

How do we do that you might ask? Our passions are things we love to do like playing a sport, writing, the arts, helping others, coaching, welding, gardening, cooking whatever ignites us. Things we can’t get enough of. We want to know more, explore, learn about it. When we are engaged in our passion time becomes irrelevant. We are so absorbed in doing what we love hours drift by and we don’t even notice.

This state of being, the zone, automatically lights our fire! It is the fire that keeps us absorbed, curious and feeling alive, excited, rewarded at each little discovery, suddenly we try new methods, add something we never thought of before etc. We are deeply engrossed.

THE FIRE EXPANDS OUR THINKING

Once we explore and find our passion/s we head off to do more of them. During in this process we will discover THE ONE that we love the most, hunger for, thirst for and our talent is out from hiding. All we have to do then is follow it.

Surprisingly, when we allow ourselves to go “all in” on the journey of following our new-found talent we shift our mind to a free space, being in the zone. Nothing else enters our mind and it not uncommon for me to forget to eat!

In the zone, the fire in our belly will contribute to whatever we are absorbed in by way of auto suggestions. Things like “would it be better this way, try this, add this, no that’s not going to work, here’s something to try”. You get my drift. I experience this all the time now and it is a brilliant, relaxed, cool and calm place to be. Continue reading “TOP 10 PERSONAL DEVELOPMENT GOALS FIRE YOUR BELLY MEANING”

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TOP 10 PERSONAL DEVELOPMENT GOALS NOS: 2&3

Goal No 2 & 3: Escape rat race and take action. Let’s look at how we are stuck in the rat race and ways to get out. Again, our brain washed/conditioned sub conscious teaches us to live this way and many of us simply accept it. It is not your fault.

PRELUDE

I have covered, in depth, how our sub conscious pretty well controls our lives in my previous post titled Altered States of Consciousness Examples. If you haven’t already read this article, I suggest you do, and it will help you understand and apply what follows. For those who are already aware of our conditioned sub conscious let’s explore and take action shall we?

THE RAT RACE

Let’s picture in our minds the image of a giant wheel in a cage where millions of rats run forward, the wheel constantly turns in a never ending circle and they get nowhere. This is the bulk of humanity going around in a circle. Do we see ourselves there?

ESCAPE RAT RACEWhere are we when we participate in the ludicrous behaviour? In our comfort zone. So cosy doing what everyone else is doing, following the only plan in our sub conscious that has been placed there from the limited thinking of our parents, peers and teachers.

We have inadvertently absorbed these habits and it is not our fault. How do we get out of this never ending circle? Answer: challenge our comfort zones.

GOAL NO: 2 TRASH OUR COMFORT ZONES

Our comfort zones are full of unhealthy lies, deceptions and automatic decisions. One poignant one that comes to my mind is, our parents voted labor, liberal etc resulting in us voting the same. We don’t question whether we actually agree with the party lines, we simply do what our parents did and it is so warm and cosy. How’s this one: Mum and Dad follow the footy and support ………. and without questioning, who do we support? Remember there are a few independent free thinkers out that choose for themselves.

Our automatic behaviours are so ingrained almost across the board of life. We might ask ourselves what can I do to habitually make my own choices. Retrain our sub conscious. How do we do that? In this modern world there are self-help programs everywhere to help us create our own plan, our own unique blueprint and discover what we want to choose in life, instead of accepting what is installed in our comfort zones.

Remember our brains are sophisticated computers and we can install whatever program we choose.

GOAL NO: 3 GET OFF THE COUCH AND TAKE ACTION

Continue reading “TOP 10 PERSONAL DEVELOPMENT GOALS NOS: 2&3”

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